Dunbar’s Number

LettersHome is committed to helping you nourish your innermost relationships, as depicted by Dunbar’s number and its corollaries.

The Magic Number

Think about all the loved ones in your life. Your family, your friends, and relatives… How do you build meaningful connections with them? You spend time with them, give them gifts, act as the shoulder to cry on when they need support. Genuine bonds take time and energy, which naturally leads us to believe that there is a limit to how many we can have. Dunbar’s Number is a longstanding theory that delves into the cognitive load of social networks. Although there is some debate around the merits of this concept, it is certainly worth exploring as a way we can better assess our relationship-building abilities.

Dunbar’s Number in a Nutshell

British anthropologist Robin Dunbar was fascinated by human social interactions. He is best known for proposing a limit to the number of stable social relationships that an individual can have. By studying anthropological data regarding human behavior in group sizes, he and his colleagues found a magic number that represents the approximate maximum number of relationships for a given person.

The 150 Rule

Dunbar’s theory states that we can maintain up to 150 meaningful relationships at a time. These people are whom we share memories, trust, and emotional bonds with. Once the number extends past 150, the depth of your connections starts to dwindle.

Circles of Connection

Dunbar’s number theory includes additional numbers within the 150-person cutoff. He proposed several hierarchical categories that an individual’s social network could be organized into. Think of each category as a ring around you:

• The closest ring consists of 5 people, your closest relationships

• Next is a ring of 15 good friends who you keep in close contact with

• Following that is 50 friends you feel comfortable sharing with

• Then, 150 shallower bonds that still have a degree of meaningful connection

• Past the Dunbar line is 500 acquaintances, people you occasionally interact with

• And finally, 1,500 individuals you’d be able to recognize on the street

According to Dunbar, these are the categories of relationships humans can successfully maintain. As relationships change, people can still move within the rings, and the amount of people within each ring are dependent on the individual; these numbers just serve as maximum capacities.

Quality over Quantity

So what does all this mean? Well, it emphasizes the importance of quality relationships. Dunbar's Number offers a valuable perspective on the quantity and quality of our social connections. Maintaining relationships creates a heavy cognitive load, and spreading out your energy too much can result in empty connections. It’s vital to cultivate your smaller group of authentic relationships because deep attachments are what truly enrich our lives.

What should you do?

How do you strengthen your close relationships? As we are constantly pulled in every direction by work, social media, and other responsibilities, relationships are often forgotten. We at LettersHome have made it our mission to create the close connection many of us have forgotten to nurture. We believe that in order to have heartfelt bonds, you have to be mindful and deliberate in nourishing them. It’s a little difficult to decide where to start, so we have compiled a list of steps you can take to build your relationships.

Invest Time: Dedicating time to your relationships is paramount. Make an effort to stay in touch–even a quick message can make a huge difference!

Quality Interactions: Quality over quantity doesn’t just apply to the number of relationships. Real relationships require you to be present and active.

Life Balance: Don’t spread yourself too thin with work or other responsibilities. Make sure to balance those things out with relationships that bring you joy and fulfillment.

Offer Assistance: Support them with their goals and ambitions, and be there for them in times of need.

Celebrate Successes: Acknowledge each other’s achievements, no matter how small. These moments are always worth sharing with loved ones.

One Letter at a Time

We at LettersHome strive to help you give your closest relationships the attention they deserve. It’s tough to stay on top of investing time, creating quality moments, and making room for our loved ones. Our app gives you an opportunity to slow down & reflect, and share life updates with those most important to you. It’s a tool for authentic connection placed right at your fingertips. Pausing your life to call, go visit, or write an email from scratch is a lot, but LettersHome makes it easy to keep in touch by sending a personal letter or monthly update with our app. ✉️ 🏠

Why use LettersHome?

• You'd like to share regular updates about your family or household

• You love your friends but simply don't have the time for daily chats

• You want to better stay in touch with your parents or grandparents

• You find solace in shared experiences and stories

• You have friends in different time zones or countries

• You feel like social media only scratches the surface

What can I do with LettersHome?

• Share important life moments in a genuine way

• Use guided prompts and custom categories to organize your updates

• Effortlessly send updates to different groups of people in your life

• Ask for recommendations and provide your own

• Talk about what’s on your mind and start a conversation

LettersHome is your space to create authentic life updates for the people in your life who truly matter most.

Check it out on the App Store and shoot us a message on Instagram (@lettershomeapp) with your thoughts! We’d love to hear from you.